tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28905984357870822562024-03-14T05:48:19.010-07:00Haydon's Movie HouseChris Haydonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07405830859708282340noreply@blogger.comBlogger268125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2890598435787082256.post-60879215977075302892013-02-13T09:18:00.002-08:002013-02-13T09:18:42.369-08:00THIS IS 40 <div style="text-align: center;">
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I've written you a sort-of song about <b>Judd Apatow</b>'s sort-of sequel Think yourselves lucky.</div>
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Things get really tough when you're 40</div>
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Yesterday you were happily 39</div>
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Then holy shit you've turned 40</div>
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And that's like probably half your life.</div>
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Now you need Viagra to get a boner</div>
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Even though Leslie Mann is fucking fine for her age</div>
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Despite having two kids with the dude behind the camera</div>
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I mean, come on Rudd, get it up and in bruv.</div>
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Now you've realised money's tight</div>
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Been too generous with your cash</div>
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Gotta tighten up as your 40</div>
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And soon you'll be dead and your kids will have fuck all left.</div>
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Better start exercising and get out on your bike</div>
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Wearing all the gear makes you look better</div>
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Even though you actually can't ride for shit</div>
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But don't worry because it's all funny and at least you are trying.</div>
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Next head to the doctors and let him check you out</div>
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Make a gag whilst fingering your arsehole</div>
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And laughing whilst his face is basically in your cunt</div>
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Now you feel better, because being 40 makes you more prone to life-threatening illnesses.</div>
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The children are getting in the way</div>
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You want a cheeky blowy or a quickie before the school run</div>
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It fucking sucks being 40</div>
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Still wanting sexual adventures despite feeling too old.</div>
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Relationship is getting strained</div>
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Things keep bubbling over</div>
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Time to step back and re-assess</div>
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Pretty difficult when you are 40.</div>
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This song probably sounds like</div>
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That I'm taking the royal piss</div>
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And that <i>This is 40 </i>is a pile of dogshit</div>
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When actually it's Apatow's finest film to date.</div>
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Paul Rudd and Leslie Mann are excellent</div>
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Plus the supporting cast are great</div>
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The script is beautifully balanced</div>
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And its often hilarious and sincere.</div>
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So go see <i>This is 40</i></div>
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It's one of the best movies about relationships</div>
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And one of the strongest pictures I've seen this year</div>
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I'm gonna stop typing now, as I've run out of ideas.</div>
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You can send my Academy Award for Best Original Song via Royal Mail. Fuck you Adele, you don't deserve shit. Bitch.</div>
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Chris Haydonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07405830859708282340noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2890598435787082256.post-40300765550715311812013-01-28T14:37:00.000-08:002013-01-28T14:50:22.417-08:00MOVIE 43 Review<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Featuring perhaps the biggest and best ensemble cast in recent movie-going history, <i style="font-weight: bold;">Movie 43 </i>is a masterclass in comedy filmmaking; a picture so original, so smart and so side-splitting that any of its comedy competitors will be left quaking in their boots.</div>
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With Oscar-worthy performances from <b>Gerard Butler</b>, <b>Johnny Knoxville</b>, <b>Christopher Mintz-Plasse</b> and the sensational <b>Jason Sudeikis</b>, this is a rare breed of hilarity - a film to forever treasure, revisit and adore...</div>
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<i>Movie 43 </i>is so unbearably awful, so monumentally unfunny and so totally fucking depressing, it may be the worst cinema experience I've ever had in my entire life. </div>
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Nobody should have to damage their brains and burn their retinas with this steaming pile of dogshit.</div>
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If this isn't amongst the worst films of 2013 by December then I don't want to be a film critic any more.</div>
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Chris Haydonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07405830859708282340noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2890598435787082256.post-27378171735805913242013-01-28T13:51:00.001-08:002013-01-28T13:51:10.281-08:00Bieglow, bin Laden & the Backlash...<div style="text-align: center;">
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I realise I have been <b>MASSIVELY</b> negligent with the site recently so please accept my apologies, Merry Christmas, Happy New Year, hope you've still keeping your resolutions and so on... </div>
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Anyway now that's out the way; one comes to you with a topic for great discussion and it regards <b>Kathryn Bigelow</b>'s utterly masterful <i style="font-weight: bold;">Zero Dark Thirty </i>which was theatrically released in the UK last Friday. This is probably a fucking dumb thing to say seeing as we are only 28 days into 2013, but this is undoubtedly the best picture I've seen this year so far and I'm actually glad I didn't get to see it in 2012 or my top 10 list would have been turned upside down, and I could not be dealing with that shit...</div>
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If you've left the house over the past fortnight, chances are you would have read an article or overheard a discussion regarding <i>Zero Dark Thirty </i>and whether it is either pro-torture, a propaganda piece or a means to glorify war violence. All of these three things are utterly false and incredibly incorrect, but that hasn't stopped the media jumping on Bigelow's film like a pack of hungry, politically-correct wolves. Here are just a few titles from a quick search on Ask Jeeves...I mean Lycos, I mean....Google.</div>
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So yes, there are massive speculations and suspicions, with many batting against the film rather than for it, but as previously mentioned, these comments are not factual nor essentially correct, they are actually rather misjudged opinions.</div>
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During the opening 20 minutes of Bigelow's near three-hour spectacular, there are some scenes of torture; nasty, painful scenes. Scenes which will make you grimace, scenes which showcase the psychological and psychical horrors of war. An early interrogation presents viewers with water-boarding followed by involuntary stripping and being shoved into a small box for umpteen hours. This is a tough pill to swallow, but that's the whole fucking point. None of these things sound remotely fun and are not projected in any ways to seem desirable or entertaining, they are merely a dramatisation of recent cultural and political history.</div>
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In a film that's deemed to be 'propaganda', you'd expect <b>Jessica Chastain</b>'s Maya; a woman who dedicates ten years of her life to finding Osama bin Laden, to have a huge blow-out when the Navy Seals finally get the bugger in May 2011. Perhaps she and her pals would take a dump on his body and burn it before getting slaughtered in some dingy Pakistani bar...yeah, that's not what happens. I've seen propaganda films, in fact I've seen so much Nazi propaganda it's worrying, and one can tell you categorically that <i>Zero Dark Thirty </i>is not a project of this calibre - bin Laden's death is handled with great respect and grace; he is merely part of a job that needs to be 'completed' for lack of a better word. Nothing offensive or provocative is screened, nothing ill or judgemental is presented.</div>
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However it isn't just the media who have been cruel to Bigelow, the Academy voters have too by not nominating her for Best Director at the 85th Oscars this year, and this must be partially down to the torture debates. How could a group of United States voters not want to award a woman who has captured on film their biggest political and public safety achievement in recent history? It's utterly insane. Plus <i>Zero Dark Thirty </i>is one of the best examples of directorial cinema for many-a-year. Most filmmakers would be proud, better yet honoured to touch the towering heights Bigelow smashes with her exceptional procedural drama. Film classes and schools around the world will reference this great work long after all this hype dies.</div>
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In some respects, the controversy surrounding the film is probably doing it favours; more people are talking, so more people are watching, which equates to more money and more essentially free promotion, but I hope those visiting their local multiplexes are going because they want to see this fascinating, arresting and completely captivating film rather than just hoping to jump on the bandwagon of backlash. </div>
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In the war on Bigelow, I'm proud to stand by her side and confront the oncoming storm.</div>
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<i style="font-weight: bold;">Zero Dark Thirty </i>is in cinemas nationwide now.</div>
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Chris Haydonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07405830859708282340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2890598435787082256.post-64769259864712658362012-12-10T08:48:00.000-08:002012-12-10T09:02:19.092-08:00The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey Review<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<b><u><i>The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey </i>[HFR 3D]</u></b></div>
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<b>(dir: Peter Jackson - 2012 - New Zealand/USA - Cert: 12A - MGM - 169 Mins)</b></div>
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Perhaps the year's final anticipation film for many is <b>Peter Jackson</b>'s first part of his latest <b>J. R. R. Tolkien</b>-adapted trilogy <i style="font-weight: bold;">The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey</i>.<i style="font-weight: bold;"> </i>The film sees the director return to Middle Earth; the mythical world which made Jackson a legend to many and indeed the Academy who slapped his <i style="font-weight: bold;">Lord of the Rings </i>trilogy with multiple Oscars, but any statues this picture may receive will be undoubtedly ill and forcibly removed from stony hands...</div>
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There is no denying that Jackson is a skilled filmmaker, in fact the term 'skilled' seems a little backhanded; he's a fine cine-craftsman who can compose a shot and construct a frame with a brilliance that incorporates dramatic scale yet gentle intimacy. No matter what epic battles may be ensuing in the foreground, or what vast, supremely plush landscapes may swallow the background, Jackson's camera supremely and sensibly captures it all and he can do it with such finesse that it seems expected of him. However, he isn't a great storyteller. </div>
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Previous works in his filmography have proven this: <i>The Lovely Bones</i>, <i>King Kong </i>and now <i>The Hobbit</i>; a massively misjudged, mistimed and mistaken feature which screens like a marathon. Jackson's problem is he doesn't know when to say 'cut'; the picture's screenplay is only as good as it's length, and considering this is the first part in a trilogy adapted from a children's novel of 310-360 pages (depending on which edition), the script can't be that hefty. One imagines a good lump of the document is explanatory prose describing the scenes and settings rather than what Jackson needs to truly focus on. We know he can make a gorgeous looking film but clearly he doesn't understand the importance of a compelling narrative.</div>
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This problem isn't helped by the lack of editorial authority he has on <i>The Hobbit </i>either - clocking in at a mammoth 169 minutes; just 11 measly minutes short of three hours, the film is an endurance and indeed patience test that will have even the biggest <i>LOTR </i>fan clock-watching and wondering just why he needed so long to show so little. The film is crammed with unneeded fluff and filler that a strict editor and producer would force Jackson to remove but alas, this isn't the case. It's frankly baffling that this first instalment of the trilogy is longer than Tom Hooper's forthcoming <i>Les Miserables </i>which is not only adapted from a beloved stage musical, but also from Victor Hugo's 1,488 page novel - a book nearly FIVE TIMES <i>The Hobbit</i>'s length. </div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Still from <i>The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey </i>(dir: Peter Jackson, 2012)</td></tr>
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Adding insult to injury is the newly adopted framing technology HFR (High Frame Rate) which screens a picture at 48FPS (Frames Per Second) as to the usual 24FPS virtually every other picture is presented in. The doubled frame rate is supposed to make the film feel more 'real' for lack of a better word - it's installation is similar to that of HD television but obviously on a much greater scale. To say the eye has to get used to the HFR is a massive understatement, in fact you'll spend the film's opening 30 minutes wondering if you need to visit the opticians. </div>
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It looks like you are watching a behind-the-scenes documentary on a Blu-Ray rather than a movie; things look albeit 'too normal' and a lot less rosily magical. Trees look like the ones on your street, hillsides and landscapes look like ones on a postcard, and whilst this should be seen as a positive, it dramatically drags you from any sort of cinematic involvement. If <i>The Hobbit </i>has anything going for it, surely it must be the awe-inspiring, dizzyingly impossible world of Middle Earth right? Well Middle Earth looks like rural England on <i>Countryfile </i>for a lump of the picture's first act.</div>
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Once the eye is trained to the format, the picture does start to look better; the few action scenes (it feels like a few considering the gigantic gaps between them anyway) are beautifully constructed and the CGI effects are staggering. Crumbling rocks that crash around our pals with tiny feet for example look authentic, powerful and dangerous, particularly when you are donning those annoying 3D glasses, plus the cinematography and location shooting in New Zealand looks as radiant and beautiful as it did back in 2001 when we embarked on the first <i>LOTR </i>journey but one personally, and I don't think I'll be the only one, couldn't help but think throughout "We've seen all this before"...</div>
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Because the film is so long and for the most part very little happens besides the Hobbits and dwarves nattering whilst strolling past gorgeous backdrops, it's easy to become disengaged and disinterested, and worst of all, unimpressed. Jackson's films are artfully made; screaming talent and impossible amounts of work and dedication burst from every still, but when the viewer becomes disconnected emotionally, all that seems redundant, and for all those who put untold effort into the picture's production, that's a catastrophic disservice.</div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Still from <i>The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey </i>(dir: Peter Jackson, 2012)</td></tr>
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Plus the film never tries to be it's own entity - we all know it's part of the same saga and collection of works by Tolkien, but it is a separate story with some different characters, and a different goal for the protagonist, yet it all feels in vein. Jackson makes no attempt to invite those who didn't see or like <i>LOTR</i>, it's simply expected, and yet many have the audacity to moan about the <i>Twilight </i>pictures - at least <i>Breaking Dawn: Part 2 </i>attempted to bring in new audience members by offering a new sense of style and identity, whether it succeeded or not is down to you. Too much on Jackson's part feels lazy and that's so incredibly frustrating when we all know he isn't one to sit back and let the picture work around him.</div>
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The performances are fairly good for the most part - <b>Martin Freeman </b>is a perfect Bilbo Baggins; the younger version of <b>Ian Holm</b>'s Hobbit and uncle to <b>Elijah Wood</b>'s Frodo - his protagonist oozes with charm and charisma, plus his sense for adventure and exploration makes him the likely hero but it's a shame the world he's put in feels reused for the wrong reasons. <b>Ian McKellan </b>looks noticeably older as master wizard Gandalf despite the film's narrative being set before the <i>Lord of the Rings </i>- it's a hiccup that will plague this new franchise. <b>James Nesbitt</b>, <b>William Kircher</b>, <b>Ken Scott </b>and <b>Richard Armitage </b>(who easily shines brightest)<b> </b>are all fun as the dwarves who share some occasionally great banter, and some other returning faces from the previous films slip comfortably back into their shoes. </div>
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The film's saving grace is <b>Andy Serkis </b>who yet again steals each scene as Gollum - he actually seems more frighteningly weird here and he is one of the few things that truly benefits from the increase in technology. His slippery skin and demoniacally bulging eyes looks spectacular, plus the motion capture suit makes his movements look gaunt and eerie. </div>
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<i>The Hobbit </i>makes too many mistakes along it's biblical journey that it's moments of greatness seem so far out of reach. It's a tremendous shame as the film had so much potential; sure it's a feast for the eyes, but very little else. The fact that two more of these pictures await, and chances are each one will gain in length as the franchise continues, Jackson is clearly testing your nerves, loyalty and indeed stamina. Those who truly love <i>LOTR </i>will probably enter <i>An Unexpected Journey </i>with tinted vision, knowing they will adore it no matter what happens, but the causal cinema-goer and film-fan will find it a difficult, uncomfortable and seemingly pointless affair. It takes Jackson nearly three hours to translate about 5 chapters in which a good 3 of them would have been eliminated by most other filmmakers. It's simply too much. One thinks not too many will be ecstatic about returning for another 5 this time next year. I for one certainly am not...</div>
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<b><u>By Chris Haydon</u></b></div>
Chris Haydonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07405830859708282340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2890598435787082256.post-63196746178154808752012-11-24T03:48:00.002-08:002012-11-24T03:48:45.355-08:00Got a little mention on this Kermode Blog....<div style="text-align: center;">
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Chris Haydonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07405830859708282340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2890598435787082256.post-56553681505244058442012-11-22T15:12:00.000-08:002012-11-22T15:12:34.473-08:00Silver Linings Playbook<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Being the closing stages of 2012, audiences brace themselves for the awards takeover; films of the highest calibre that offer sumptuous direction, sublime writing and staggering performances - films that are honestly aren't often as good as they are believed to be. Thankfully David O. Russell has dodged this troublesome bullet twice in two years; first with his brilliantly handled <i>The Fighter </i>and now with <i>Silver Linings Playbook </i>which not only acts as a beautiful companion piece to it's predecessor, but also stands tall as a typical 'Oscar film' which isn't typical at all...</div>
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After being released from a stint in a mental institution, former History teacher Pat Solitano (<b>Bradley Cooper</b>) moves back in with his parents (<b>Robert Di Nero </b>and <b>Jackie Weaver</b>) following the collapse of his job and his marriage, although he's adamant his wife is still hopelessly devoted to him. Soon he meets Tiffany (<b>Jennifer Lawrence</b>); a sexy, seductive young widow who too is battling past emotional and psychological demons. The pair hit off a tempered, exhausted relationship built upon favours and the idea that both of them are worthy at a shot of supposed normality and indeed happiness.</div>
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Going back onto that 'typical' remark; yes, films about characters dealing with mental trauma are the cake the Academy feed off, as are dramas about fractured, complicated family units, and even films about overcoming struggles and uncertainty. In fact on face value, <i>Silver Linings Playbook </i>seems so run-of-the-mill, so obvious when actually it might be 2012's hardest picture to pigeon-hole.</div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Still from <i>Silver Linings Playbook </i>(dir: David O. Russell, 2012)</td></tr>
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It's not a romantic-comedy as such, nor is it truly a drama, or a comment on illness and psychological behaviour; it's all of these things and heaps more. O. Russell who also penned the adapted screenplay from Matthew Quick's celebrated novel, has managed to formulate a film that is surprisingly bettered by it's tonally uneven state. It actually feels bipolar like it's characters; undecided, unpredictable and consequently, utterly engrossing. </div>
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Not a dull moment passes due to such a brilliant screenplay which is bound for Oscar glory - I'd put money on it, plus some of the year's best collective performances as well as a brilliantly supportive soundtrack, lovingly suburban cinematography and some supremely stylised direction. In short, <i>Silver Linings Playbook </i>has it all to offer it's spectator.</div>
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O. Russell captures the film with a brilliant intimacy; you are there with the family in amongst the madness, the tenderness and the sheer frustration of the cards life has dealt. His film screens with bursting realism, yet it's hinged upon some of the year's funniest and snappiest dialogue. Usually a big laugh can drag you from the drama, but not here, instead the chuckles feel like nervous twitches; a comforting reaction to the suppressed mayhem that ensues within the Solitano household. </div>
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It isn't just Pat who clearly has issues inside the home, Pat Sr., played wonderfully by Di Nero in his best screen role for years, suffers with intoxicating OCD. Being Philadelphia's biggest Eagles fan, he risks his pride, money and welfare on their games because of his certainties in his compulsive betting routine. Plus Dolores, again dazzlingly handled by Weaver, has to deal with all of this oddity and she manages by unhealthily attempting to constantly keep the peace. </div>
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The film is very similar to <i>The Fighter </i>in regards to construction and screened substance - both films portray a unstable family, both present ordinary people in extraordinary circumstances, and both have a honesty that only betters the viewing experience. <i>Silver Linings Playbook</i>'s dancing plot elements are filmed and framed much like the boxing bouts in his last work - there are no cheesy montages, only moments captured with beauty and dedication.</div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Still from <i>Silver Linings Playbook </i>(dir: David O. Russell, 2012)</td></tr>
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The real Oscar money to grab at the bookies however is on the two central performances from Cooper and Lawrence. Playing Pat must have been a challenge; he's an emotionally tarnished, mentally distraught and fractured figure, someone who has to re-adjust and re-build. Cooper has never taken on such a weighted role before but you wouldn't believe it. This is undoubtedly a career-best performance and a career-making turn too - he will get nominated and it wouldn't surprise me if he grabbed the statue. Whilst one feels Joaquin Phoenix is the rightful owner for <i>The Master</i>, it's a delight to see just what Cooper is capable of. Now stop making those horrible <i>Hangover </i>films for goodness sake...</div>
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Lawrence's performance on the other-hand is the scene-stealer. She absolutely dominates <i>Silver Linings Playbook </i>and continues to confirm why she's one of the best actresses of this generation. Her direct, bruising approach makes for frequently funny and uncomfortable viewing. This is probably her most complex role since her breakout performance in the masterful <i>Winter's Bone </i>and she offers the same raw power and finesse here, despite this being a significantly bigger budgeted and kinder film. Lawrence could have easily put the breaks on and still been applauded, but she turns Tiffany up to eleven and the results are dizzying. </div>
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Plus Chris Tucker is in this film. He's actually in a film that isn't <i>Rush Hour</i>. I know, it's amazing. It's like seeing a rare bird or something...</div>
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Few films this year can provide an audience such heft and grit, yet such joy and wonder. O. Russell's Oscar 2012/2013 petition piece is a life-affirming, emotionally stimulating and blissfully joyous genre-hybrid that excites, electrifies and excels. <i>Silver Linings Playbook </i>is truly fabulous contemporary cinema.</div>
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Chris Haydonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07405830859708282340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2890598435787082256.post-54546814467027631162012-11-16T12:07:00.003-08:002012-11-16T12:07:15.551-08:00The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn - Part 2<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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My review for Bill Condon's <i>Breaking Dawn - Part 2 </i>is over at FILMORIA for y'all to read.</div>
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Spoiler alert - it's really great.</div>
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Click the poster above for the review.</div>
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Chris Haydonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07405830859708282340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2890598435787082256.post-49542115869542529172012-10-29T02:27:00.000-07:002012-10-29T02:27:37.749-07:00SKYFALL<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<i>My name is Lester Burnham. This is my neighbourhood. This is my street. This is my life. I am 42 years old, and in less than a year I will be dead. Of course I don't know that yet, and in a way, I am dead already.</i></div>
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<span style="color: white; font-family: inherit;"><i style="line-height: 18px;">Skyfall </i><span style="line-height: 18px;">has had a pretty torrid time making it's way to our screens. First MGM run into heaps of financial shit at the end of 2010, then they declare bankruptcy and leave the film in purgatory, then they come out of bankruptcy and aim for Bond to get a universal release date on November 9th 2012 and then here in the UK, we got it on the 26th October. And breath.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: white; font-family: inherit;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">To say people were doubtful about the film's context would be an understatement too; I recall the laughter and mocking when the title was released, plus many thought Sam Mendes would create a more dialogue-driven Bond film rather than one laden with action and thrills. Turns out he did both.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: white; font-family: inherit;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">Perhaps the greatest thing about <i>Skyfall </i>is it's balance; this is a fantastically exciting, gripping and edgy film that's as equally sentimental to 007's past as well as being wholly original and current. It's flashy but not cheesy, explosive but grounded and smart but not patronising. Mendes' 50th anniversary outing is quite frankly brilliant.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: white; font-family: inherit;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">It's beautifully crafted and handled with Mendes pulling out some of his finest camerawork to date. The stalking sequence in Shanghai is utterly absorbing and elegant with it uses of neon lighting which splits the darkness in two as 007 lingers around corners and blends into the night. It's fucking awesome to be honest. </span></span></div>
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<span style="color: white; font-family: inherit;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">I won't evaluate the plot because you've already seen it but I will relay this information; </span><i style="line-height: 18px;">Skyfall </i><span style="line-height: 18px;">is a great film on it's own merits and a damn near-perfect Bond picture. It's a highlight of the year and has certainly eased the pain of those bruises left by the assault that was <i>Quantum of Solace</i>... </span></span></div>
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<span style="color: white; font-family: inherit;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">Sadly this babe doesn't make a cameo though. Who else was thinking Bond girl?</span></span></div>
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Chris Haydonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07405830859708282340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2890598435787082256.post-9461668256411471202012-10-16T12:57:00.002-07:002012-10-16T12:57:41.865-07:00UNCONTROLLABLE HAPPINESS.<div style="text-align: center;">
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Every film critic dreams of their first 'proper' review quote used on a film poster or trailer; it's a thing that finally means somewhere out there, distributors recognise you, actually give a shit what you say about their movies, that you are helping the acceleration of the film project in question. Today this happened to me. Whilst browsing YouTube and trailer sites, I came across the new international trailer for my favourite film of 2012, <i style="font-weight: bold;">Rust and Bone</i>, a film which I have reviewed twice for <b>Filmoria </b>- once at Cannes and the other a matter of days ago at London Film Festival.</div>
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Whilst watching the trailer, I stopped, rewound and lent deep into my iPad screen. Fuck me, I've been quoted. I actually had to double-check that my eyes didn't deceive me but no, my words are there alongside other critics from massive global publications.</div>
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I'm obviously thrilled - I've been placed on a film I love so dearly, a movie I want people to embrace, but I'm just as pleased for the site. Filmoria is a wonderful place to work for with some fantastic contributors who all deserve to share this quote with me and to have their words placed on trailers and posters too. The site is worthy of praise and recognition so it would mean a huge deal to me if you readers could do two things: </div>
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<b>1. See <i>Rust and Bone - </i>it's a masterpiece.</b><br />
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<b>2. Visit <a href="http://www.filmoria.co.uk/"><span style="color: red;">FILMORIA</span></a> and view the work of all the brilliant film critics I have the pleasure to work alongside. </b></div>
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This is a team effort and something that has made me so grateful. Sorry to sound like I'm giving an <i>X Factor </i>sob-story...</div>
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Here's the trailer too. Enjoy!</div>
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Chris Haydonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07405830859708282340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2890598435787082256.post-58045537003180669742012-10-13T14:07:00.000-07:002012-10-13T14:07:03.115-07:00(500) Days of Ruby...<div style="text-align: center;">
<img src="http://gingerparrot.co.uk/wp/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/Ruby-Sparks-Kazan.jpg" /></div>
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2012 has been a fantastic year for American indie and
arthouse cinema; just some of the releases include <i>Martha Marcy May Marlene</i>, <i>Beasts
of the Southern Wild </i>and <i>The Perks of
Being a Wallflower</i> and now joining this shining list is <i>Ruby Sparks</i> - a brilliantly funny,
charming and engaging comedy-drama that illuminates the screen with passion and
intelligence. </div>
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Beautifully performed, wonderfully scripted and handled
with delicately able hands, this is a complete package tied with a silver
lining bow. Paul Dano provides a demanding and frequently side-splitting
performance whilst Zoe Kazan is blissfully dominates the picture with charming and engrossing energy as his
'dream' woman Ruby.</div>
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<i>Ruby Sparks </i>is a fantastical, magical and
loving romantic feature and yet another film that I've got to find space for on
my top 10 list this year....</div>
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<b><span style="font-size: x-large;"><u>...SHIT.</u></span></b><span style="color: windowtext; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 10.0pt; mso-ansi-language: #0400; mso-bidi-language: X-NONE; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: #0400;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
Chris Haydonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07405830859708282340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2890598435787082256.post-10171258376232321352012-09-18T07:40:00.000-07:002012-09-18T07:40:04.496-07:00And the BBFC's Dumbest Recent Decision goes to...<div style="text-align: center;"><img height="640" src="http://returntofleet.files.wordpress.com/2012/07/taken-2.jpg" width="430" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>Certificate: 12A</b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>Contains Moderate Violence and Threat</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>So now you can take the kids to see Neeson kicking ten tons of shit out of Turkish terrorists. Although chances are your little ones may question Liam's behaviour for which you cannot respond. They're ears are too delicate to know about the sex trade from the first film...</b></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">Many thanks to <b><a href="http://www.theshiznit.co.uk/news/liam-neeson-dials-down-threat-following-taken-2s-12a-rating.php"><span style="color: red;">The Shiznit</span></a></b> for creating this fantastic image below which I simply had to share...</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><img alt="Liam Neeson dials down threat following Taken 2's 12A rating" src="http://www.theshiznit.co.uk/images/main/liam-neeson-dials-down-threat-following-taken-2s-12a-rating.jpg" /> </div>Chris Haydonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07405830859708282340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2890598435787082256.post-53369813961441902612012-09-18T06:53:00.001-07:002012-09-18T06:56:15.180-07:00Why are Britain's Blu-Ray and DVD Releases so SHIT?<div style="text-align: center;"><img height="400" src="http://blokecave.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/Avengers-update-cover.jpg" width="400" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">If you're a film nerd and have nothing better to do with your precious time, you may have heard about the backlash that's coincided with the Blu-Ray and DVD release of one of the year's best films, <b><i>Avengers Assemble</i>.</b></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: left;">Considering the film is the <b>HIGHEST GROSSING PICTURE</b> of 2012 beating <i>The Dark Knight Rises</i>, it's fair to expect a reasonably good home media release right? Like maybe a double-disc Blu-Ray with lots of special features and perhaps a nice case/slip-cover? Not much to ask is it Disney and Marvel considering we gave you over $80 million in box-office sales in this country alone?</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"> Instead us lucky Brits get this shit-fest above; a single disc Blu-Ray with virtually NO EXTRAS (not even a commentary), no slip-cover or fancy edition and even worse, the film has been CUT. This is undoubtedly the most depressing Blu-Ray/DVD release of the year so far considering the sheer potential of this release. Granted the film looks fucking incredible and sounds perfect but that's simply not good enough. Most British retailers are selling this Blu-Ray for £16.99 - certainly at the higher end of the week's releases in price terms and for that money, you get basically fuck all. It may as well be a rental copy. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"> The USA received <b>FOUR </b>versions of the film on Blu-Ray and DVD to choose from. Four. Each of them offering more for their hard-earned bucks. Using an online currency converter, your £16.99 sterling would equate to around about $27.59 US dollars. With that cash, you could afford this...</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><img height="400" src="http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/91ePGDN19jL._AA1500_.jpg" width="400" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">A set that includes the film on <b>BLU-RAY 3D</b>, Blu-Ray, DVD, Digital Copy plus it comes with the <b>ORIGINAL SCORE </b>and a <b>bonus disc of extras</b>. Now scroll back up to the sorry piece of fucking cunt we get. How is this fair?</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"> Now US Blu-Ray sets are often better than UK releases and one can only assume that is simply the studios and manufactures decisions; US released picture warrants a more comprehensive US home media release perhaps but then surely the pricing should be more balanced? If this US <i>Avengers </i>set was released in the UK, it would probably sell for about £23-25 which would be about $38-40 US dollars, nearly a third more expensive than the actual retail price in America.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"> With Blu-Ray truly surging too, many films are getting the update and special edition sets are out in their droves. Check out this UK future Blu-Ray release of <i>Singin' in the Rain</i>...</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><img height="400" src="http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/81diXpjHhxL._AA1500_.jpg" width="400" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">The three disc set includes the film fully restored on Blu-Ray and DVD as well as a bonus disc featuring in excess of 4 hours extras and comes with a 48 page hard-cover book filled with interviews, images and exclusive artwork. It sounds perfect; the set this masterful film deserves. Plus it's reasonably priced at £17.99, just a single bloody pound more than our version of <i>Avengers Assembled Really FUCKING BADLY</i>. So far so good; a happy Chris here ready to purchase, but wait, the US release? How much is that? $60? So basically £36 for the same thing? What a joke. Oh wait, it's not the same....</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><img height="400" src="http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/81DTIfW0PbL._AA1500_.jpg" width="400" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><img height="400" src="http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/91Vw8qXW48L._AA1500_.jpg" width="400" /> </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">Still three discs, same extras, same book, but wait? It also has a photograph pack, a second book including the screenplay, a collectable set of art cards, a limited edition and numbered boxset and what's that? No way. <b>A MOTHERFUCKING UMBRELLA</b>. An umbrella. SERIOUSLY. And that's only £9 more expensive than the UK release. KILL ME.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"> Maybe I just care too much, but as an avid and proud Blu-Ray and DVD collector, I'm getting fucking sick of always having second best. Even British films seem to get better, more expansive home media releases in the States and it's quite frankly ridiculous. When we do a boxset or Blu-Ray release right, it can be spectacular; see the forthcoming Hitchcock Blu-Ray collection and the latest <i>Harry Potter </i>Wizard's Collection...</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><img height="400" src="http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/71-ZdGxI91L._AA1500_.jpg" width="400" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><img height="400" src="http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51OBH8ENyJL.jpg" width="340" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">But both of these sets are available in the US for the same price, if not cheaper. I'm getting sick of importing my Blu-Rays and DVDs but it seems to be the only way to get what you deserve for your coin...</div>Chris Haydonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07405830859708282340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2890598435787082256.post-21282286377601325712012-09-17T05:59:00.000-07:002012-09-17T05:59:22.669-07:00Period Dramas AREN'T BORING.<div style="text-align: center;"><img height="249" src="http://i.telegraph.co.uk/multimedia/archive/02287/downton_2287265b.jpg" width="400" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">Last night, one of Great Britain's best shows returned to our screens attracting an average of 9.3 million viewers. The show before it, <i>The X Factor</i>,<i> </i>still topped the evening however with 9.7 million. Admittedly it's fairly obvious that more people would tune into the talent show over Julian Fellowes' masterful <i><b>Downton Abbey</b> </i>seeing as it's appeals to a wider audience as well as airing before the watershed but that's beside the point of this article. Even with a figure as impressive as 9.3 million, so many still believe period dramas are boring and they couldn't be further from the truth. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"> Currently some of the finest shows on television fall into the period drama bracket - they may not all be about aristocrats, lords and dukes, but they still present audiences with a visual representation of a past era. These shows include:</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><img height="266" src="http://wac.450f.edgecastcdn.net/80450F/screencrush.com/files/2012/04/121.2.jpg" width="400" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><i><span style="font-size: large;">Boardwalk Empire</span></i></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><i><span style="font-size: large;"><br />
</span></i></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><img height="259" src="http://kevinwarnock.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/mad-men-cast.jpeg" width="400" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b><i>Mad Men</i></b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b><i><br />
</i></b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><img height="249" src="http://i.telegraph.co.uk/multimedia/archive/02315/Parade_s-End_2315946b.jpg" width="400" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b><i>Parade's End</i></b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b><i><br />
</i></b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><img height="298" src="http://www.ifyouwriteit.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/The-Borgias-cast.jpg" width="400" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b><i>The Borgias</i></b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b><i><br />
</i></b></span></div><div style="text-align: left;"> And of course <i>Downton</i>. All of these shows offer as much tension, drama, suspense, sex and scandal as any other major television drama but because the casts are often draped in older fashion or aren't constantly tweeting each other on their iPhones, it's not 'interesting' enough. Even a show like <i>Game of Thrones </i>could be considered a period piece in some respects and that's more grisly and depraved than some pornography.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"> What period dramas do better than any other television show genre is bring an element of sheer cinematic grace to the small screen. They are lavish, sumptuous entertainment; shows that have been handled and crafted with true artistry and beauty. Often their running times mirror a 90 minute feature film too which only emphasises this point. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"> Yes sometimes the dramatic dialogue changes can take some getting used to as well as the era in which the show is set but that isn't enough to be a prude and think it's uninteresting. Last night's <i>Downton </i>was simply riveting, engrossing drama littered with humour and fantastic performances - everything you could possibly want from a Sunday evening television show.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"> It's difficult to covert someone into liking period dramas because for many they are like Marmite but if you haven't watched any of the shows above, do yourself a favour and try. I'm certain you won't regret it. </div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b><i><br />
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</div>Chris Haydonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07405830859708282340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2890598435787082256.post-31192821984393700762012-09-11T11:51:00.002-07:002012-09-11T12:36:09.842-07:00Chris' Top 10 Films of All Time in Pictures<div style="text-align: center;"><img height="217" src="http://i313.photobucket.com/albums/ll366/dudethoseareisotopes/Tumblr%20junk/juno.gif" width="400" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">Just for the excuse of actually making a list, here's what I like to consider as my top 10 favourite films of all time. It's an incredibly hard list to compile for any cinephile but alas, here we go. I'm sure the vast majority of you will totally disagree with me too...</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
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<div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><u>The 5 That Just Missed Out:</u></b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><u><br />
</u></b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>15. <i>Funny Games </i></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>(dir: Michael Haneke - 1997 - Germany/Austria - Artificial Eye - 108 Mins)</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>14. <i>Touch of Evil </i></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>(dir: Orson Welles - 1958 - USA - Universal Pictures - 95 Mins)</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>13. <i>Saturday Night and Sunday Morning </i></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>(dir: Karel Reisz - 1960 - UK - Woodfall Films - 89 Mins)</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>12. <i>Annie Hall</i></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>(dir: Woody Allen - 1977 - USA - Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer - 93 Mins)</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>11. <i>American Beauty</i></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>(dir: Sam Mendes - 1999 - USA - DreamWorks - 122 Mins)</b></div><br />
<br />
<br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>10.</b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><br />
</b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><img height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjeQln-9G5DiWVAIY_08Uk1oXyKQnEGSZ4mKJqQulbU8xtmaB5RQQMmfqncJxvEAW0Ac2qQPPxXcIhqHpVHfJ6e6ylUWrqsZu99xEfSlfxliSnSJz3MGzy3ag6o5UXwbehz0pD8piR8m4eX/s400/stand_by_me_1.jpg" width="400" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><i>Stand by Me </i></b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>(dir: Rob Reiner - 1986 - USA - Columbia Pictures - 89 Mins)</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">9.</span></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br />
</span></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><img height="262" src="http://i2.listal.com/image/1502799/600full-irreversible-screenshot.jpg" width="400" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><i>Irreversible</i></b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>(dir: Gaspar Noe - 2002 - France/Spain - 120 Films - 97 Mins)</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">8.</span></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br />
</span></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><img height="237" src="http://robliano.files.wordpress.com/2012/01/top20jerks-nedryerson-590x350.jpg" width="400" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><i>Groundhog Day</i></b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>(dir: Harold Ramis - 1993 - USA/Canada - Columbia Pictures - 101 Mins)</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">7.</span></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br />
</span></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><img height="266" src="http://viewfromacouch.files.wordpress.com/2010/08/inception-shared-dreaming.jpg" width="400" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><i>Inception</i></b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>(dir: Christopher Nolan - 2010 - UK/USA - Warner Bros. - 148 Mins)</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">6.</span></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br />
</span></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><img height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEheCF4LRWW4MGFGOq4bGsult8UxY1s1_V_GqJOrOjUKFlakpLQ3Ir0icBKUhxE5HnCsq5qVNtYGJW0dobl2GDZiMhlezzLu2HYDzk_TNyMO7W7S0eo6-KK3YpHEKwXpwX2JJGWGUu7osU56/s400/Meet+Me+In+St.+Louis-07.jpg" width="400" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><i>Meet Me in St. Louis</i></b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>(dir: Vincente Minnelli - 1944 - USA - Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer - 113 Mins)</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">5.</span></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br />
</span></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><img height="271" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2Xs514Wca9CAYPEY34znHpmRS91ZIYyiwDPaWxfrWjAtLvT5VBannOPdQGUsM9-aUu658EFPteZ5EBdDqcfOY4DgHhncUEeWPi4VHNpXTx71JVbcFAjxsn_7arJ-ZHA2nD7GsrQmgeTHK/s400/pans-labyrinth-1.jpg" width="400" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><i>Pan's Labyrinth</i></b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>(dir: Guillermo del Toro - 2006 - Spain/Mexico - Estudios Picasso - 118 Mins)</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">4.</span></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br />
</span></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><img height="213" src="http://www.lazydork.com/movies/juno.jpg" width="400" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><i>Juno</i></b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>(dir: Jason Reitman - 2007 - Canada/USA - Fox Searchlight Pictures - 96 Mins)</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">3.</span></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br />
</span></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><img height="211" src="http://i1.cdnds.net/12/34/618x326/movies_toy_story_1.jpg" width="400" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><i>Toy Story</i></b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>(dir: John Lasseter - 1995 - USA - Pixar Animation Studios - 81 Mins)</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">2.</span></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br />
</span></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><img height="223" src="http://www.siue.edu/~ejoy/Cache.jpg" width="400" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><i>Cache (Hidden)</i></b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>(dir: Michael Haneke - 2005 - France/Austria/Germany - Artificial Eye - 117 Mins)</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">1.</span></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br />
</span></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><img height="280" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjReIoE06WmJJkRrImnwecT-QfUY7nGs9GE0HUF49dKebDy1Uxks8IhUdfuN9XNrV8IgLZ7lRvYoQD7okSGH4k_17Z4I_vN-BXsIhRfPOCvNe9opxWK8y4higHi_FUFM5F6TLn2Gr40stU/s400/manhattan_1979_2.jpg" width="400" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><i>Manhattan</i></b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>(dir: Woody Allen - 1979 - USA - Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer - 96 Mins)</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div>Chris Haydonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07405830859708282340noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2890598435787082256.post-77653705799102084842012-09-09T10:31:00.000-07:002012-09-09T10:31:50.851-07:00Top 5...<div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><u>...Depressing Movies</u></b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><u><br />
</u></b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lpkyviXVK21qfe0jro1_500.gif" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><u><br />
</u></b></span></div><div style="text-align: left;">Now I'm a happy-go-lucky kinda guy but some of the greatest films ever made are <b>FUCKING DEPRESSING </b>so in Haydon's Movie House fashion (which is a total lie as this is the first time I've done this...) here's my top five depressing films that will make you grab that Ben and Jerry's quicker than lighting and make you sob when you check your iPhone and see that <b>NOBODY</b> has called or text you. Enjoy, I guess...</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>5.</b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><br />
</b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><img height="225" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgp5PnKq_6Earf7dDWf9jQUgccJciPFJT1IKua6JDw4ignaUiDICued1nki0U6-CCZLb6Zo-ljSM788uSGZIL6QZjeetbv38YRiSvgpcJqtaIXxHuvqEEBjJrwgKEdDAx9fMRPWSlYoLHpx/s400/grave-of-the-frieflies-still.png" width="400" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><i>Grave of the Fireflies </i>(1988)</b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>(dir: Isao Takahata - Japan)</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: left;">I know what you're thinking: "Chris, it's a fucking Studio Ghibli film mate, get a grip", well I'd love to agree but <i>Grave of the Fireflies </i>is an utterly beautiful and equally devastating film about a young father and daughter who are desperate to survive during the horrific events of the Second World War. Spoiler alert: virtually everyone and everything fucking dies in a bloody, brutal and albeit artistic way.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>4.</b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><br />
</b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><img height="261" src="http://newslang89.files.wordpress.com/2011/04/veradrake2.jpg" width="400" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><i>Vera Drake </i>(2004)</b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>(dir: Mike Leigh - UK)</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: left;">Not only is this one of the best films of the 2000s, it's also one of the most eye-watering, wrist-slitting pictures in Leigh's filmography and recent British cinema. It feels odd to feel such strong emotions towards a back-street abortionist but trust me, <i>Vera Drake </i>will get under your skin and upset you long after the DVD ends. I bet it's even more horrendous on Blu-Ray...</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>3.</b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><br />
</b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><img height="237" src="http://i2.listal.com/image/1648507/600full-requiem-for-a-dream-screenshot.jpg" width="400" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><i>Requiem for a Dream </i>(2000)</b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>(dir: Darren Aronofsky - USA)</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: left;">I know - you were expecting this to be number one like every other list online. There's no doubt that it's worthy of the top-spot but I've still got two more cards to reveal. Aronofsky's audacious, incredible and heart-wrenching drug drama is utterly earth-shattering and soul destroying, particularly Ellen Burstyn's character, Sara Goldfarb whose descending spiral into the blackened belly of addiction is simply eye-gouging to endure. This is a sheer masterpiece which deserves to be seen by all, you'll just want a long bath and cake afterwards...</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>2.</b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><img height="300" src="http://coosacreek.org/mambo/wp-content/uploads/2009/05/dancer-in-the-dark-1-800.jpg" width="400" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><i>Dancer in the Dark </i>(2000)</b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>(dir: Lars von Trier - Denmark/Spain/USA)</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: left;">You thought <i>Melancholia </i>and <i>Antichrist </i>were depressing? Man, you ain't seen shit. Lars' best film (yeah I said it) is one of the most unshakable, harrowing films in recent filmmaking. I'm pretty sure he actually hated Bjork, that's how cruel this film is. She learns to speak fluent English in order to start going blind, have everything taken away from her, have all her money stolen that she has worked so hard for to help her son get to college, gets banished from her home after being accused of theft and foul-play and then she fucking dies. <b>JESUS LARS YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD</b>. It's like <i>Precious </i>only really, really good and actually moving. Just typing about it is making me sad.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>1.</b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><br />
</b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><img height="228" src="http://i2.listal.com/image/1502797/936full-irreversible-screenshot.jpg" width="400" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><i>Irreversible </i>(2002)</b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>(dir: Gaspar Noe - France/Belgium)</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></div><div style="text-align: left;">No, it's not just because it has that horrific 9 minute anal rape scene which is sickening and virtually unbearable, it's because even in the slightest glimmers of hope that begin to emerge at the end of this reverse narrative masterpiece, you know that it's all in vein. Soon enough, everyone will meet their depressing and often timely fates. Even the joys of falling pregnant is tarnished by the sheer brutality of the violence and sexual abuse Monica Bellucci meets. Noe's <i>Irreversible </i>is one of the few films that is actually unforgettable and it's equally one of cinema's most defining and important releases. After watching, you will feel drained of any life and happiness for a good week or two and you'll instantly want a Happy Meal and a hug. <b>TRUST ME</b>.</div>Chris Haydonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07405830859708282340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2890598435787082256.post-24633494717649114212012-09-09T09:24:00.002-07:002012-09-09T14:56:29.955-07:00LFF 2012: Top 5 to See<div style="text-align: center;"><img height="328" src="http://www.filmnav.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/BFI-London-Film-Festival-2012.jpg" width="400" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">If you visit this site often, you'll know the BFI London Film Festival is on it's way and I for one cannot wait. This year has seen a big change in the programming with many films being separated in categories including 'Love', 'Thrill', 'Family' and 'Dare' as well as the usual Gala screenings, Competition pictures and Special Screenings. With other 200 movies this year, there is at least 65 films I would love to see during the festival. The likelihood of this is fucking minimal obviously but still...</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"> Anyway, out of the huge list (which doesn't feature <i>The Master</i>!), here's the five films I psychically have to see...<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>5.</b></span><br />
<br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><center><iframe allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen" frameborder="0" height="300" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/w918Eh3fij0" width="520"></iframe><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><br />
</b></span></center><center><br />
</center><center><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><i>Argo</i></b></span></center><center><b>(dir: Ben Affleck - USA)</b></center><center><b><br />
</b></center><center style="text-align: left;">With a fantastic cast, a director on-top of his game and a genuinely thrilling narrative premise, <i>Argo </i>looks like a winner. This is Ben's first steps away from Boston and judging from early word and trailers, this is going to be a highlight at LFF.</center><center style="text-align: left;"><br />
</center><center style="text-align: left;"><br />
</center><center style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>4.</b></span></center><center style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><br />
</b></span></center><center><iframe allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen" frameborder="0" height="300" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/LA6FFnjvvmg" width="520"></iframe><br />
</center><center><br />
</center><center><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><i>Beasts of the Southern Wild</i></b></span></center><center><b>(dir: Benh Zeitlin - USA)</b></center><center><b><br />
</b></center><center style="text-align: left;">I stupidly missed this at Cannes but I won't at LFF. It's been showered with praise since early 2012 and it sits highly on many top 10 lists for the year. The trailer looks harmonious and gorgeous and I cannot wait to take this journey.</center><center style="text-align: left;"><br />
</center><center><br />
</center><center><br />
</center></div></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>3.</b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><center><iframe allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen" frameborder="0" height="300" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/Sw_FUB8M3sM" width="520"></iframe></center><center><br />
</center><center><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><i>Compliance </i></b></span></center><center><b>(dir: Craig Zobel - USA)</b></center><center><b><br />
</b></center><center style="text-align: left;">"Taut", "tense", "terrifying" - these are many of the words that feature in the abundance of grade A reviews for Zobel's thriller which is inspired by true events. I've done a lot to stay away from as much information regarding the plot but I simply cannot wait to see this one.</center><center style="text-align: left;"><br />
</center><center style="text-align: left;"><br />
</center><center style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>2.</b></span></center><center style="text-align: center;"><br />
</center><center><iframe allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen" frameborder="0" height="300" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/rpber_qx82s" width="520"></iframe></center><center><br />
</center><center><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><i>End of Watch</i></b></span></center><center><b>(dir: David Ayer - USA)</b></center><center><b><br />
</b></center><center style="text-align: left;">This has been on my anticipation list for months now and I cannot believe it is playing in Competition at LFF. <i>End of Watch </i>looks like a cinematic adrenaline shot to the heart littered with brilliant performers and such wonderful uses of modern camera and filmic technologies. Some of the trailer above looks like a first person shooter video game and that's just <b>BAD ASS</b>.</center><center style="text-align: left;"><br />
</center><center style="text-align: left;"><br />
</center><center style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>1.</b></span></center><center style="text-align: center;"><br />
</center><center><iframe allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen" frameborder="0" height="300" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/8ah9h3icY1k" width="520"></iframe></center><center><br />
</center><center><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><i>Simon Killer</i></b></span></center><center><b>(dir: Antonio Campos - USA/France)</b></center><center><b><br />
</b></center><center style="text-align: left;">I'm actually surprised a Campos movie is my most anticipated of the festival because I absolutely <b>HATED</b>, in fact <b>DETESTED</b> his début <i>Afterschool</i> - I thought it was the biggest load of pretentious shit I've endured for years and Ezra Miller had the screen presence of a flannel but his follow-up, <i>Simon Killer </i>which stars the fabulous and underrated Brady Corbet looks phenomenal. The film sadly doesn't have a trailer yet but from what I've seen, my appetite is certainly wet. It's also produced by the team behind <i>Martha Marcy May Marlene </i>which is still one of the year's best films, if not the best, and that too featured Corbet so high-fives all round. <i>Simon Killer </i>looks like filthy, edgy gold.</center><center style="text-align: left;"><br />
</center><center style="text-align: left;"><br />
</center><center style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>Other Movies in my Must-See List:</b></span></center><center style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b><br />
</b></span></center><center style="text-align: center;"><b><i>After Lucia </i>(dir: Michel Franco - Mexico/Spain)</b></center><center style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></center><center style="text-align: center;"><b><i>Blacanieves </i>(dir: Pablo Berger - Spain)</b></center><center style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></center><center style="text-align: center;"><b><i>Robot & Frank </i>(dir: Jake Schreier - USA)</b></center><center style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></center><center style="text-align: center;"><b><i>Beyond the Hills </i>(dir: Cristian Mungiu - Romania/France/Belgium)</b></center><center style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></center><center style="text-align: center;"><b><i>Wasteland </i>(dir: Rowan Athale - UK)</b></center><center style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></center><center style="text-align: center;"><b><i>Frankenweenie 3D </i>(dir: Tim Burton - USA)</b></center><center style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></center><center style="text-align: center;"><b><i>Celeste and Jesse Forever </i>(dir: Lee Toland Krieger - USA)</b></center><center style="text-align: center;"><b><br />
</b></center>Chris Haydonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07405830859708282340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2890598435787082256.post-25378050397231861002012-09-06T14:40:00.002-07:002012-09-09T05:15:13.467-07:00London Film Festival 2012: Schedule Breakdown <div style="text-align: center;"><img height="242" src="http://www.close-upfilm.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/LFF12_CNEmailHeader_v1.160014.jpg" width="400" /> </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Films which look amazing:</b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"></div><ul><li><b><i>END OF WATCH</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>COMPLIANCE</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>AFTER LUCIA</i></b></li>
<li><b><i><b style="font-style: normal;"><i>SIMON KILLER</i></b> </i></b></li>
<li><b><i>BEASTS OF THE SOUTHERN WILD</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>ARGO</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>ROBOT AND FRANK</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>CELESTE AND JESSE FOREVER</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>BEYOND THE HILLS</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>THE SESSIONS</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>FRANKENWEENIE 3D</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>WOLF CHILDREN</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>WASTELAND</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>THE WE AND THE I</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>MY BROTHER THE DEVIL</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>ZARAFA</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>Girls Against Boys</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>Ginger and Rosa</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>Room 237</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>Seven Psychopaths</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>Sightseers</i></b></li>
</ul><div><b><i><br />
</i></b></div><div><b><span style="font-size: large;">Films which look kind of amazing:</span></b></div><ul><li><b><i>HYDE PARK ON HUDSON</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>WISH YOU WERE HERE</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>BLACK ROCK</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>GREAT EXPECTATIONS</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>CRAZY EYES</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>GRASSROOTS</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>EASY MONEY I & II</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>The Pervert's Guide to Ideology </i></b></li>
<li><b><i>Song for Marion</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>The Jeffrey Dahmer Files</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>The Great Bird Race</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>Painless</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>Silence</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>Robot and Frank</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>Four</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>Helter Skelter</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>Just the Wind</i></b></li>
</ul><div><b><i><br />
</i></b></div><div><b><span style="font-size: large;">Films which I already know are amazing:</span></b></div><ul><li><b><i>AMOUR</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>THE HUNT</i></b></li>
<li><b><i>RUST AND BONE</i></b></li>
</ul><div><b><i><br />
</i></b></div><div><b><span style="font-size: large;">Films which look total and utter shit:</span></b></div><div><ul><li><b><i>THE SAPPHIRES</i></b></li>
</ul><div><br />
</div></div><div><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Films I categorically have to see:</b></span></div><div><ul><li><b><i>AMOUR </i>(again)</b></li>
<li><b><i>THE HUNT </i>(again)<b style="font-style: italic;"><i><br />
</i></b></b></li>
<li><b><b><i style="font-style: italic;">RUST AND BONE </i>(again)</b></b></li>
<li><b><b><ul style="display: inline !important; font-weight: normal;"><li style="display: inline !important;"><b><i>END OF WATCH</i></b></li>
</ul></b></b></li>
<li><b><b><ul style="display: inline !important; font-weight: normal;"><li style="display: inline !important;"><b><i>COMPLIANCE</i></b></li>
</ul></b></b></li>
<li><b><b><ul style="display: inline !important; font-weight: normal;"><li style="display: inline !important;"><b><i>AFTER LUCIA</i></b></li>
</ul></b></b></li>
<li><b><b><ul style="display: inline !important; font-weight: normal;"><li style="display: inline !important;"><b><i>SIMON KILLER</i></b></li>
</ul></b></b></li>
<li><b><b><ul style="display: inline !important; font-weight: normal;"><li style="display: inline !important;"><b><i>BEASTS OF THE SOUTHERN WILD</i></b></li>
</ul></b></b></li>
<li><b><b><ul style="display: inline !important; font-weight: normal;"><li style="display: inline !important;"><b><i>ARGO</i></b></li>
</ul></b></b></li>
<li><b><b><ul style="display: inline !important; font-weight: normal;"><li style="display: inline !important;"><b><i>ROBOT AND FRANK</i></b></li>
</ul></b></b></li>
<li><b><b><ul style="display: inline !important; font-weight: normal;"><li style="display: inline !important;"><b><i>CELESTE AND JESSE FOREVER</i></b></li>
</ul></b></b></li>
<li><b><b><ul style="display: inline !important; font-weight: normal;"><li style="display: inline !important;"><b><i>BEYOND THE HILLS</i></b></li>
</ul></b></b></li>
<li><b><b><ul style="display: inline !important; font-weight: normal;"><li style="display: inline !important;"><b><i>THE SESSIONS</i></b></li>
</ul></b></b></li>
<li><b><b><ul style="display: inline !important; font-weight: normal;"><li style="display: inline !important;"><b><i>FRANKENWEENIE 3D</i></b></li>
</ul></b></b></li>
<li><b><b><ul style="display: inline !important; font-weight: normal;"><li style="display: inline !important;"><b><i>WOLF CHILDREN</i></b></li>
</ul></b></b></li>
<li><b><b><ul style="display: inline !important; font-weight: normal;"><li style="display: inline !important;"><b><i>WASTELAND</i></b></li>
</ul></b></b></li>
<li><b><b><ul style="display: inline !important; font-weight: normal;"><li style="display: inline !important;"><b><i>THE WE AND THE I</i></b></li>
</ul></b></b></li>
<li><b><b><ul style="display: inline !important; font-weight: normal;"><li style="display: inline !important;"><b><i>MY BROTHER THE DEVIL</i></b></li>
</ul></b></b></li>
<li><b><b><ul style="display: inline !important; font-weight: normal;"><li style="display: inline !important;"><b><i>ZARAFA</i></b></li>
</ul></b></b></li>
</ul></div>Chris Haydonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07405830859708282340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2890598435787082256.post-42819928385800147922012-09-02T13:07:00.000-07:002012-09-02T13:07:44.956-07:00This Week...<div style="text-align: center;"><img src="http://static-l3.blogcritics.org/12/08/09/183745/kate-beckingsale-jessica-biel-total-recall-2012.jpg?t=20120809062135" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">You can see these two babes looking <b>FUCKING SMOKING </b>in <i>Total Recall.</i></div><div style="text-align: center;">You can see Ben Stiller, Jonah Hill, Moss from <i>The IT Crowd</i> and that horrible fat cunt in <i>The Watch</i>.</div><div style="text-align: center;">You can see hands appearing from mouths in <i>The Possession</i>.</div><div style="text-align: center;">You can see that twat from <i>My Family </i>in <i>A Few Best Men</i>.</div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><br />
</i></div><div style="text-align: center;">Or...</div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><br />
</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><img height="249" src="http://i.telegraph.co.uk/multimedia/archive/02261/Berberian-Sound-St_2261783b.jpg" width="400" /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">You can see <i>Berberian Sound Studio </i>- one of the year's very best and most ambitious films.</div><div style="text-align: center;">Take your pick.</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div>Chris Haydonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07405830859708282340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2890598435787082256.post-35004189003950714942012-08-30T07:30:00.001-07:002012-08-30T07:32:18.777-07:005 Hopes for LFF.<div style="text-align: center;"><img height="243" src="http://www.close-upfilm.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/lff2012.jpg" width="400" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">Not long now until one of my favourite festivals arrives and with the opening and closing films being announced (Tim Burton's <i>Frankenweenie </i>3D and Mike Newell's <i>Great Expectations</i>), I thought I'd jot down 5 films that I really hope make the festival schedule come next Wednesday. How likely these picks are is debatable mind you...</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">5.</span></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><center><iframe allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen" frameborder="0" height="300" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/waR5wslQbS0" width="520"></iframe></center><center><br />
</center><center><span style="font-size: large;"><b><i>Amour</i></b></span></center><center><b>(dir: Michael Haneke)</b></center><center><b><br />
</b></center><center style="text-align: left;">Probably the most likely film on this list to appear at LFF, Haneke's <i>Amour </i>went down a storm at Cannes, where I was lucky enough to see it, and the film took home the prestigious Palme d'Or. This is an extraordinary work of filmic art which I'd love to see again.</center><center style="text-align: left;"><br />
</center><center style="text-align: left;"><br />
</center><center style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">4.</span></b></center><center style="text-align: center;"><br />
</center><center><iframe allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen" frameborder="0" height="300" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/hWnAqFyaQ5s" width="520"></iframe></center><center><br />
</center><center><span style="font-size: large;"><b><i>Cloud Atlas</i></b></span></center><center><b>(dir: The Wachowski Brothers)</b></center><center><b><br />
</b></center><center style="text-align: left;">It's playing at TIFF next month and it looks pretty incredible considering I have not a single fucking clue what it's all about. The ensemble cast includes Tom Hanks, Halle Berry, Jim Broadbent, Hugh Grant, Hugo Weaving, Susan Sarandon and many more which is enough to sell the film to me anyway, plus it looks visually breathtaking.</center><center style="text-align: left;"><br />
</center><center style="text-align: left;"><br />
</center><center style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">3.</span></b></center><center style="text-align: center;"><br />
</center><center><iframe allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen" frameborder="0" height="300" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/aog8680PVmU" width="520"></iframe></center><center><br />
</center><center><span style="font-size: large;"><b><i>The Perks of Being a Wallflower</i></b></span></center><center><b>(dir: Steven Chbosky)</b></center><center><b><br />
</b></center><center style="text-align: left;">Again it's premièring at TIFF and has all the qualities for a spot at LFF. <i>TPOBAW </i>looks like a charming and insightful coming-of-age drama for which I am greatly excited for. Many of you may or may not know that I have huge problems with Ezra Miller and I really want him to impress me so hopefully he can do such a thing alongside Emma Watson and the dweeby kid from <i>The Three Musketeers</i>....</center><center style="text-align: left;"><br />
</center><center style="text-align: left;"><br />
</center><center style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">2.</span></b></center><center style="text-align: center;"><br />
</center><center><iframe allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen" frameborder="0" height="300" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/fJ1O1vb9AUU" width="520"></iframe></center><center><br />
</center><center><span style="font-size: large;"><b><i>The Master</i></b></span></center><center><b>(dir: Paul Thomas Anderson)</b></center><center><b><br />
</b></center><center style="text-align: left;">Premièring at Venice in a number of days before heading over to TIFF, hit-making auteur PTA's latest is making it's festival rounds and one can only hope it washes up along the Thames. Starring Joaquin "the whole bearded rap thing was just a massive LOL" Phoenix, Philip Seymour Hoffman and Amy Adams, this has Oscar written all over it and rightly so. <i>The Master </i>looks sensational.</center><center style="text-align: left;"><br />
</center><center style="text-align: left;"><br />
</center><center style="text-align: center;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">1.</span></b></center><center style="text-align: center;"><br />
</center><center><iframe allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen" frameborder="0" height="300" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/ZVUk-BRZVAM" width="520"></iframe></center><center><br />
</center><center><span style="font-size: large;"><b><i>Les Miserables</i></b></span></center><center><b>(dir: Tom Hooper)</b></center><center><b><br />
</b></center><center style="text-align: left;">Please, please, <b>PLEASE</b>. Tom Hooper of <i>The King's Speech </i>fame is a frequent face at LFF with his films regularly playing the festival and I cannot hope higher that his adaptation of <i>Les Miserables </i>makes the bill. With a sensational cast, staggering set design and sumptuous costume, this looks like the cinematic adaptation the masterful stage show deserves. I cannot bloody wait.</center><center><span style="font-size: large;"><b><i><br />
</i></b></span></center>Chris Haydonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07405830859708282340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2890598435787082256.post-19553723666987794812012-08-24T14:02:00.002-07:002012-08-24T14:12:19.451-07:00I'd Hire The Expendables...<div style="text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://justflick.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/The-Expendables2-new-poster-slice.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="308" src="http://justflick.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/The-Expendables2-new-poster-slice.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">I've only just got round to seeing <i>The Expendables 2 </i>and let me tell you this - it's great. Utterly ridiculous, total preposterous and unbelievably far-fetched yes, but it's still a wonderful action romp that's filled with spectacular set pieces, fabulous design and frankly hilarious dialogue. The screenplay is basically a series of '80s film gags and puns; simply heaven.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"> Stallone dominates as per usual plus Van Damme is a brilliant villain. Norris actually makes a self-referenced joke which drops perfectly and Lundgren looks like he's had a stroke. Oh and Crews is nearly as mental as he is in these Old Spice commercials which are quite frankly the finest things ever crafted by man...</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"></div><center><iframe allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen" frameborder="0" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/TXK3Z4JC8S8" width="520"></iframe></center><center><br />
</center><center style="text-align: left;"> Anyway, <i>The Expendables 2 </i>is a vast improvement on it's predecessor, for which I still liked very much. Having Simon West direct rather than Stallone means the scale and settings for the film seem grander, more authentic; it looks like a high-budget action film rather than just a giant celebration of '80s muscle and testosterone. Plus all that naff serious stuff is gone (fuck off Mickey Rouke) and the narrative is able to shine through allowing for scenes of loose drama and those of comedy.</center><center style="text-align: left;"><br />
</center><center style="text-align: left;"> Perhaps the best thing about the movie for me is seeing it after watching the year's worst films within one week. It's strange how two 'comedy' movies couldn't make me smile, laugh or feel entertained yet a group of old bastards shooting the living shit out of anything that doesn't speak English could make me feel so happy. I'm not sure if that's worrying or dementedly reassuring. All I know is that I would hire The Expendables to rid the world of these...</center><center style="text-align: left;"><br />
</center><center style="text-align: center;"><img height="225" src="http://www.radiotimes.com/rt-service/image/render/Keith_Lemon_s_LemonAid.jpg?imageUrl=http://static.radiotimes.com.edgesuite.net/pa/96/36/webANXkllemonaid.jpg&width=580&height=327&quality=85&specialisation=tv&mode=crop" width="400" /> </center><center style="text-align: center;"><br />
</center><center style="text-align: center;"><img height="266" src="http://www.aceshowbiz.com/images/still/the-three-stooges-img04.jpg" width="400" /> </center><center style="text-align: center;"> </center><center style="text-align: center;"><br />
</center><center style="text-align: center;"><img height="225" src="http://www.channel4.com/assets/programmes/images/chris-moyles-quiz-night/chris-moyles-quiz-night-20090310101217_625x352.jpg" width="400" /> </center><center style="text-align: center;"><br />
</center><center style="text-align: center;"><img height="266" src="http://www.onedirection.net/wp-content/uploads/2011/07/alan_carr_chatty_man.jpg" width="400" /> </center><center style="text-align: center;"><br />
</center><center style="text-align: center;"><img height="225" src="http://www.channel4.com/assets/programmes/images/rude-tube/6e40fdd7-52c3-4853-8245-07a2fe0cceee_625x352.jpg" width="400" /> </center><center style="text-align: center;"><br />
</center><center style="text-align: left;">Could you imagine Stallone pummelling, Statham stabbing and Crews blasting this stupid little indie prick to pieces?</center><center style="text-align: left;">I'd sleep easy for eternity. </center>Chris Haydonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07405830859708282340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2890598435787082256.post-4018122847637092812012-08-24T06:11:00.000-07:002012-08-24T06:11:01.580-07:00'Keith Lemon: The Film'...<div style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.filmoria.co.uk/2012/08/film-review-keith-lemon-the-film/#.UDd7Ed1mSex"><img height="301" src="http://i1.cdnds.net/12/26/618x466/keith_lemon_the_film_poster.jpg" width="400" /></a> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">...Is about as fun as being repeatedly punched in the face.</div><div style="text-align: center;">Read my full verdict at Filmoria by clicking the poster above.</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div>Chris Haydonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07405830859708282340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2890598435787082256.post-3338887099060862882012-08-20T13:10:00.000-07:002012-08-20T13:10:30.031-07:00Tony Scott 1944-2012<div style="text-align: center;"><img src="http://static.guim.co.uk/sys-images/Guardian/About/General/2012/8/20/1345437890928/Tony-Scott-006.jpg" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">He loved that grubby old hat.</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">May you rest in peace Tony; American and British cinema has lost a true hero today.</div><div style="text-align: center;">My thoughts are with his friends and family at this tragic time.</div>Chris Haydonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07405830859708282340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2890598435787082256.post-62651817716077379152012-08-20T13:01:00.000-07:002012-08-20T13:01:37.247-07:00Be BRAVE.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2ncubM5DH1sPxp00cPZtbzXENJj2WR7EQAw6smLXPLkHkBhhxYwhppE6LDvNYizKDG_Jp247AhEkt2lRt2CIuhPXNamRxYNY6LsTqZy1oOOXOyZ9_PR1US3ItbEtAx0_JQDEUQuLA6Bo/s1600/brave.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2ncubM5DH1sPxp00cPZtbzXENJj2WR7EQAw6smLXPLkHkBhhxYwhppE6LDvNYizKDG_Jp247AhEkt2lRt2CIuhPXNamRxYNY6LsTqZy1oOOXOyZ9_PR1US3ItbEtAx0_JQDEUQuLA6Bo/s640/brave.jpeg" width="448" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><b>SHOCK HORROR</b>. I've only just seen Pixar's <i>Brave </i>despite being the studio's biggest fan (I even wrote my university dissertation on <i>Toy Story </i>for goodness sake) but fear not, my verdict is finally here...</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"> After some pretty mixed reviews and the majority of audiences expecting a lot from the film that follows in <i>Cars 2</i>'s rather poorly worn tyre-tracks, it's fair to say <i>Brave </i>has had a pretty tough few weeks in the US and the UK but perhaps the worst thing is that it doesn't warrant any of this.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"> <i>Brave </i>is one of the most beautiful, wonderful and compelling animated films I have ever seen. Every single frame screams with detail, emotion and magic; it's a 100 minute work of art that has to be seen to be believed. The movement of Merida's hair, the crashing of water against rocks, the sun-shadows that sparkle in the eye - it's simply incredible in every production area possible.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"> The score is perfect, as is the cinematography, the characters are fantastic and the twist is gleefully surprising. It actually angers me to think that some people believe this is 'art'...</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><img height="287" src="http://www.saatchi-gallery.co.uk/imgs/artists/emin-tracey/tracey-emin-my-bed.jpg" width="400" /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">...when you can simply pop down to your local multiplex and see this; actual art. Something that has actually taken effort, time, construction and formulating. Something composed with beauty, talent, intelligence and patience. Which image looks better? The above or this...</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><img alt="A scene from Brave - Looking over an ancient castle with Scottish mountains in the background" height="200" src="http://www.visitscotland.com/cms-images/2x1/about/arts-culture/film/castle" width="400" /> </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Exactly.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"> This is not just a fanboy praising a film from a studio he loves so dearly, this is actually a message to all those imbeciles who still don't think cinema is artistic. Companies like Pixar and directors like Christopher Nolan are out there with their middle fingers up proving you wrong. <i>Brave </i>is an audacious, rousing and sumptuous movie-going experience and it's quite possibly the best film of 2012 so far. Oh, and the short film before called <i>La Luna </i>is a masterwork. Check out a brief clip below.</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><center><iframe allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen" frameborder="0" height="300" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/CR3kZHds9Bw" width="520"></iframe></center>Chris Haydonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07405830859708282340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2890598435787082256.post-64365271377699059542012-08-18T09:44:00.000-07:002012-08-18T09:44:40.997-07:00'The Bourne Legacy' Review<div style="text-align: center;"><img height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZIT0-QibwC_Tqf20RmmL5IMRCvvfa6Dk5O75pUIrluWZMvQQHX8G1JqV36gNrScWNSUas1QPhyphenhyphenyNNDkMYkJx_dWDpm80m-lO6whW3athiCXpEl5Tz0_S5tcZnTseM4XmEdIjvtSZbfXI/s640/the_bourne_legacy_poster_by_francus321-d4qiz1n.jpg" width="430" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">Despite what you may have heard, Tony Gilroy's <i>The Bourne Legacy </i>is actually really good; the problem is it really doesn't know what kind of film it actually is.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"> Is it a sequel? A prequel? A reboot? Well, it's actually just your standard espionage thriller really just with Jeremy Renner being all super-human. He's snappin' necks and cashin' cheques bitches.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"> Perhaps the film's biggest issue is that because it holds the <i>Bourne </i>name, audiences will enter with a level of expectation for action and intelligence, however what they will receive is lots of jargon-laden dialogue and very little action. Now this sounds like I really don't like the movie which couldn't be more incorrect. Despite it's flaws, this is still riveting and engrossing cinema with some staggering set pieces, wonderful cinematography, a brilliant climactic chase sequence and flawless performances; Renner and Rachel Weisz are simply fantastic.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"> If you enter it with an open mind, you'll probably enjoy it more. Just don't go in expecting Jason...</div>Chris Haydonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07405830859708282340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2890598435787082256.post-25459347414968166162012-08-15T01:22:00.000-07:002012-08-15T01:22:04.861-07:00Snow White or No White?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.theoccidentalobserver.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/Snow-White-Huntsman.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="285" src="http://www.theoccidentalobserver.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/Snow-White-Huntsman.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><div style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;">In a shock decision by Universal today, the studio have decided to drop Kristen Stewart from the sequel of <i>Snow White and the Huntsman </i>in light of her recent exposures. The studio are now forwarded a 'spin-off' feature focusing entirely on Chris Hemsworth's Huntsman rather than a straight narrative second feature.</div><div style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"> After reading this, I felt compelled to give my thoughts. <i>Snow White and the Huntsman </i>was and is one of my highlights from 2012; I found it to be thrilling, visually staggering and often frankly chilling. You can read my original review <a href="http://haydonsmoviehouse.blogspot.co.uk/2012/06/snow-white-and-huntsman-review.html"><span style="color: red;">here.</span></a></div><div style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"> Anyway, is it just me or does this move by Universal seem a bit of an over-reaction? Granted both Stewart and director Rupert Sanders were wrong to engage in an intimate relationship and surely both should have been wary enough to know that nothing stays under-wraps in Hollywood for long but this is hardly the scandal of the century. All the press had was a picture of them at dinner and sharing a kiss in a park. It's not <i>One Night in Paris </i>or Tulisa getting a mouthful now is it?</div><div style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"> Perhaps the most frustrating thing is that <i>SWATH </i>proved to many doubters that Stewart is actually extremely talented. She carries this film with great presence and persistence, and although recent events would obviously taint her young career and popularity, if this second film goes ahead, I'm sure all audiences will notice a K-Stew sized hole.</div><div style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"> Surely the easier option would be to replace the director rather than the leading lady; Sanders is a new filmmaker who has already buggered up his career by this move anyway and there are plenty of talented directors who would love to get stuck into a film like this. Someone like Sam Raimi whose upcoming prequel <i>Oz: The Great and Powerful </i>looks utterly fantastic or Darren Aronofsky who could pump some serious madness into this twisted fairytale.</div><div style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"> I know Stewart has annoyed her most valued people; her fans, but this just all seems so silly to me. I'd rather Universal completely pull the second film rather than make a <i>Snow White </i>with <i>No White</i>.</div><div style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"></div><br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;"></div>Chris Haydonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07405830859708282340noreply@blogger.com0